Justin (IronGargoyle) did this and the results were pretty humorous, so I figured I’d give it a try:
Jon is Free
Jon is Syrup Sippin’
Jon is assisted by Opera’s PR manager who will be rowing alongside the adventurous
CEO in the company inflatable raft on the trip across the Atlantic
Jon is da bomb and he would whoop anybody in anything
Jon is ready to get wild on the road.
Jon is a free man
Jon is very extremely intelligent as well as an insightful human being.
Jon is a taxpayer, which serves him right
Jon is an acupuncturist. He uses needles, herbs, and other devices to treat
ailments such as headaches
Jon is on the cover of Rolling Stone.
Jon is currently scheduled to appear Sunday the 12th at 2:30PM
Jon is charged under the Norwegian Criminal Code section 145(2) which…
And the follow-up: Jon is acquitted
Jon is doing well. His liver is not enlarged and liver panel is normal.
Jon is no ordinary architect
Jon is a wastewater and sewage removal system
Jon is a worldwide flying sensation
Jon is traveling without his cane
Jon is the antithesis of Musil’s Man-Without-Qualities
Jon is literally selling you nothing
Jon is under attack and he needs our help!!
Jon is the type of guy who thinks that winning the lottery would indicate he had
some of special number picking system
So I guess from Google one would infer that Jon was accused of criminal activity in Norway using wastewater to cross the atlantic while treating headaches and not worrying about his liver. Because he’s not ordinary and a worldwide sensation, he travelled without his cane while defying Musil and selling nothing. Due to this he was under attack, devised a special number picking system, appeared on the cover of Rolling Stone around Sunday the 12th at 2:30PM and is now da bomb, syrup sippin’ and ready to get wild on the road. After all, he is extremely intelligent and a taxpayer.